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    October 24

    作梦中梦,悟身外身

          培训,跟做梦一样。晚上近一点才睡着,做了一夜的梦,早上七点就神游到公司。


          最近总是梦到醒不来的梦,一梦醒来,天已泛白,一梦恍惚,半生已过。有的时候说着言不由衷的话,总以为尚在梦中,以为醒来便可忘却梦中的种种,却发现梦中的彷徨早已深入梦外。梦外之外,惶恐间再也难觅真实。


          始终不愿意放过自己,曾一直想做一个没有故事的人。然而,却如那句古老的人在,江湖在一样。我在这里,又怎能没有故事?昨晚问马总,你看我是个什么样的人?小孩。也许我真的是太过浮世,忘却了沉淀的成熟,走不出了迷惑只有让我用无知和幼稚来掩饰我对脆弱的恐惧。


          对未来的迷惘让我在学习他人的过程中不断得调整着我自的方向。都说天秤如风,所以我不断的吹着载着我的孤帆漫漫远行,而如今,风停了,那叶小舟会顺着那个方向一直流浪下去罢?结局或是沉舟水底?或是终停靠在某个彼岸。


          杭州有块三生石,突然很想去看看。这块石头不是奈何桥边的三生石。三生石承载了是什么?映射了前世今生甚或来世?走不出三生的羁拌,纵是喝光了孟婆手中的汤,又能如何,火红的彼岸花映出来的是忘却的无奈,还是新生的辉煌?终究也敌不过纵身跃入忘川河经受千百年忘川之水冲刷的决绝。前人所言:一世岩石出,化作英雄冢,情意无可催。二世磐石破,摆渡姻缘桥,鸳鸯两霜飞。三世玉石焚,誓守金玉盟,生死永相随。有人奢求三生,倒不如痴求一世来得真实,缘起,就不会灭。
    看透了很多人,却看不懂某些人,看清了自己,却依然不懂自己。


          走多少路,看多少人,才能懂?或许只有身历才能明了。梦中之梦,也终究是一场大梦。身外之身,依旧跳不出俗事困扰罢?


          废话真的太多,又会有人骂我吧?突然觉得有点恶心。知道来由,却无法解脱。

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